1996
I spent August 6th 1996 with my then best friend and her family in a garden. In my memory there was a pond and the garden was huge. In retrospect I don’t know if it really was a garden or rather a public park. We never talked about this day.
When they dropped me off at home my friend’s mum went ahead of us. My mum opened the door and they hugged. Both were sad. My grandparents were in the house. I did not expect them there. Even though I had spent the day outside we all went for a walk in the forest behind our house.
On the day of the funeral my sister and I took a trip to the local airport with a friend of mum’s and his wife. We left after church and while the rest of the family was at the cemetery we watched planes taking off. After the funeral we kids jumped at our mum’s and dad’s bed listening to the Smurfs songs.
2012
My dad’s parents had a lot of friends. Their calendar was full with regular get togethers. After the early passings of two of their sons their faith and the community at church gave them support. Every Sunday we had to go to church with them. After church we went to the community center and had pretzels and something to drink.
My grandparent's flat was small. A small kitchen, a living room, a bathroom, a bedroom and one room for the four children. The bedroom was always cold. There was a wardrobe next to their bed stocked with jam, juice, canned goods and long-life milk.
My grandmother died unexpectedly. My grandfather's health slowly declined. I last saw him before I took a trip to Texas. He was already in the ICU. My then ex-boyfriend picked me up at the hospital and we went to a coffee place. I sat down and cried. Every time I walk by the window and see the table it reminds me of that moment. It was an awful moment and at the same time ok. My grandfather died the day after my return from New York. I didn't get the chance to see him again.
2020
No matter who visited, expected or unexpected there was always food prepared. And a cake. During summer juice and jam was made from the berries collected in the forest or harvested in the garden.
I was never really into carnival and it wasn’t a big deal within the family but I always had the best costumes. Rented or self made. Butterfly, Harlekin oder Wiener Zuckerl Mädchen. The Wiener Zuckerl Mädchen costume was something my mum already wore when she was a child and my grandmother made it for me too.
Several days before my grandmother passed the home she lived in called us. We were allowed to visit her more than once a week. On December 18th one of the nurses called when my mum and I were about to watch a Christmas series. We thought about spending the evening at home and leaving in the morning to see my grandmother. At 10pm my grandmother passed away with me, my mum and my grandfather sitting at her bed holding her hand.